Abbott & Costello in: Who's Leaking Whom?
(With apologies to Bud Abbott & Lou Costello - a parody)
Abbott: Boy, have I got a great scandal.
Costello: Scandal? Do tell.
Abbott: Reporters and government officials.
Costello: Leaks? We're talking about leaks, right?
Abbott: Of course. And it's about who leaked the name of a CIA agent to whom.
Costello: Who?
Abbott: Karl Rove.
Costello: Rove leaked first?
Abbott: Rove leaked to Matt Cooper.
Costello: Who got it from Rove.
Abbott: Rove got it from Bob Novak.
Costello: Who gave it to Novak?
Abbott: Two other sources.
Costello: But not Rove?
Abbott: Rove already knew when Novak told him.
Costello: So Novak didn't leak it first?
Abbott: It was leaked already to Rove by an unknown reporter.
Costello: So Rove didn't leak anything?
Abbott: He leaked to Cooper.
Costello: Who got in trouble.
Abbott: Rove didn't get in trouble. Cooper did.
Costello: Who reported the story.
Abbott: And Novak.
Costello: So Novak got in trouble, too.
Abbott: No. Cooper.
Costello: But he reported it.
Abbott: Absolutely.
Costello: Novak did.
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: But Cooper only reported what was leaked to Rove, who already knew ahead of time before Novak told him, who was told by two other sources. But only Cooper got in trouble?
Abbott: He's out of trouble now. Only Judith Miller is in trouble. She's a reporter too.
Costello: And who leaked to her?
Abbott: Government sources. But she never published anything. And she didn't reveal the names of the sources.
Costello: What about Cooper?
Abbott: Cooper published but then told the grand jury who told him.
Costello: Who was Rove.
Abbott: But Rove didn't leak because he didn't mention the agent's name. Only that she was married to someone else named in Cooper's article.
Costello: So who leaked?
Abbott: Exactly. Now you're getting it.
Costello: Hey, Abbott! This is confusing! Miller, who didn't publish anything, is in jail. Novak and Cooper, who both published, are not. Rove, who confirmed what he heard from another reporter whose name we don't know, still works for the President.
Abbott: And we still don't know who the other government sources are.
Costello: But Novak knows.
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: And Rove knows who told him first before Novak.
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: But they're not saying.
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: What does the White House say?
Abbott: Nothing.
Costello: Why?
Abbott: Because they don't want to leak anything.
Costello: You're killing me!
Abbott: Boy, have I got a great scandal.
Costello: Scandal? Do tell.
Abbott: Reporters and government officials.
Costello: Leaks? We're talking about leaks, right?
Abbott: Of course. And it's about who leaked the name of a CIA agent to whom.
Costello: Who?
Abbott: Karl Rove.
Costello: Rove leaked first?
Abbott: Rove leaked to Matt Cooper.
Costello: Who got it from Rove.
Abbott: Rove got it from Bob Novak.
Costello: Who gave it to Novak?
Abbott: Two other sources.
Costello: But not Rove?
Abbott: Rove already knew when Novak told him.
Costello: So Novak didn't leak it first?
Abbott: It was leaked already to Rove by an unknown reporter.
Costello: So Rove didn't leak anything?
Abbott: He leaked to Cooper.
Costello: Who got in trouble.
Abbott: Rove didn't get in trouble. Cooper did.
Costello: Who reported the story.
Abbott: And Novak.
Costello: So Novak got in trouble, too.
Abbott: No. Cooper.
Costello: But he reported it.
Abbott: Absolutely.
Costello: Novak did.
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: But Cooper only reported what was leaked to Rove, who already knew ahead of time before Novak told him, who was told by two other sources. But only Cooper got in trouble?
Abbott: He's out of trouble now. Only Judith Miller is in trouble. She's a reporter too.
Costello: And who leaked to her?
Abbott: Government sources. But she never published anything. And she didn't reveal the names of the sources.
Costello: What about Cooper?
Abbott: Cooper published but then told the grand jury who told him.
Costello: Who was Rove.
Abbott: But Rove didn't leak because he didn't mention the agent's name. Only that she was married to someone else named in Cooper's article.
Costello: So who leaked?
Abbott: Exactly. Now you're getting it.
Costello: Hey, Abbott! This is confusing! Miller, who didn't publish anything, is in jail. Novak and Cooper, who both published, are not. Rove, who confirmed what he heard from another reporter whose name we don't know, still works for the President.
Abbott: And we still don't know who the other government sources are.
Costello: But Novak knows.
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: And Rove knows who told him first before Novak.
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: But they're not saying.
Abbott: Yes.
Costello: What does the White House say?
Abbott: Nothing.
Costello: Why?
Abbott: Because they don't want to leak anything.
Costello: You're killing me!
posted by Alan at 8:41 AM
2 Comments:
Great "commentary" !! This is what this whole mess feels like. They make us out to be fools, when they are the fools who get away with it. It burns me up. Bush says he would fire anyone involved. We know who is involved and he won't fire them. The world goes round and round...
It truly is exhausting to live under Karl Rove's Empire of the Right! But somehow the American people accept this reality. What happened? Perhaps it's not the terrorists who have contaminated and poisoned our water supply...
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